This post is dedicated to the Facebook groups Every time I go to IKEA I steal the little wooden pencils! and Vrem IKEA la Durlesti

The article is written after my first purchase at IKEA Stockholm, Kugens Kurva (biggest IKEA store in the world, kind of…they haven’t seen yet the Stejaurul factory outlet in Chişinău ).

IKEA is seen by many as the happiest place on Earth. I have even applied for a happy job in Älmhult (living room of Mr. Ingvar Kamprad). After being recruited as a supply planner and seeing my happy salary I have decided to leave immediately – I guess I am not mature enough to understand that happiness is not only about salary

IKEA is said to have been derived from I-Kill-Y(e)A due to the furniture’s ability to cause heart arrest in people who like popcorn. IKEA makes and sell flat-pack furniture but due to restrictions in the law in many nations are unable to deliver. Many people get around this by driving Volvo station wagons to IKEA and filling them to the brim with gaudy plastic tat made by Lars Larsson and Per Persson and as well Fredrick Fredricksson.

Three geeks getting excited over an IKEA catalog

Nevertheless what better way to spend Saturdays then by carrying a wardrobe through a car park or enjoying a meal of meatballs. IKEA is also a great place to spot the elusive argumentative couple, who can usually be found arguing over lamp shades and the right to bear arms. It has been proven beyond reasonable doubt that the reason for 50% of modern marriages ending in divorce is because those people try to go to IKEA together for a relaxing afternoon.

IKEA self-assembly furniture is made of balsa wood and comes with a small metal key. Instructions are usually of the standard “insert flange A into sprocket ZB-5001C” type. Unfortunately, the instructions are written in Japanese (not English or Swedish, contrary to popular belief), translated to Bulgarian, THEN Swedish, then German, Portuguese and finally Esperanto before being translated into English eaten by a grue. Fun stuff :).

Many Swedes have been banned from IKEA and taken to court for not returning the pencils that are given at the start to help fill in order forms. This created a new sport, which has not been officially named yet, where the participants run into IKEA and attempt to escape without either being caught or purchasing the popular KRAPP piece of furniture.

All of the items featured in IKEA are made with product specifications such as: they are 5 cm too big to fit into a car boot, they are missing at least one vital construction piece, the person who wrote the instructions thought it would be funny to include pictures of other instruction manuals.

IKEA was founded by the Swede Ingvar Kamprad, despite the chronic lack of style in design so typical of the Swedes. The only thing that mattered was supply chain management, namely persuading people to buy stuff directly from a warehouse.

Some tips about your shopping at IKEA:

# Having decided on which of the billions of items sold by IKEA it is that you wish to buy, you will need to visit your local store, which is probably at least 80 Swedish miles away -~800KM.

# Take a pair of binoculars with you, because your item will be on the top shelf of a 70 meters high metal rack.

# Once you have located it, spend another hour attempting to locate a member of staff. They will tell you that, very shortly, a man will come with a ladder and get it down for you. The man will never come :).

Some importants facts about IKEA:

# The royal residence of the Swedish king has only furniture from IKEA.

# Where else can you get meals for 15 SEK in Sweden (25 MLD)? At least at IKEA Korvkiosk.

# IKEA names the furniture after the child labourer who designed and constructed it.

# Apple is suing IKEA over the Apple iKea

Now I guess you are curious, what item I bought from IKEA :

p.s. I have some official videos from IKEA:

A quick question…How often you are waiting for credits of a movie or to see who are the authors of the movie, documentary…I guess, not so often. However considering the situation in my country, trust me, you should be quite brave to create such a documentary and make sure you don’t bring any offence to our dearest MR. President . Of course, the documentary doesn’t bring any political connotation, but still I was quite curious who is behind this creation…

Bingo! Chiril Lucinschi member of the Democratic Party from Moldova and son of Moldova’s second president

I was thinking why Denmark was chosen as an example and why is so much emphasis on physical education, sports halls etc.. but seeing the end of the documentary and that the idea of the documentary belongs to Chiril, everything makes sense.

Chiril indeed finished physics education in Denmark…My next question why Chiril deleted from his profile on Facebook the details about his studies from Denmark (which were available on Facebook before the elections) … to many questions for an amateur detective …anyway nice movie, great initiative!

Source: clip.md

1st of April – should be April Fool’s Day – a day invented to honour Dr. April Fools (according to uncyclopedia), but not this year. This year seems to be the year of every other day full of lies and only April Fool’s Day is the only day of the year where absolutely everything you see or hear is true .

Yes, I am now in Moldova and it is not a lie I came to vote and again it’s not a lie. Actually I am voting for the first time in my life and I am convinced that I will vote for a CHANGE – a better or worse CHANGE – time will show. The most important thing is that I have the CHANCE to vote for a CHANGE and I will not miss this CHANCE.

Besides voting, I am glad to be home close to dearest people with really good people from Sverige. I don’t know how many foreigners write Master’s thesis about Moldova, but I am really glad and proud that Johan and Hedvig (alias Johanna or Hedvin or Victoria ) decide to explore this country and I hope that they really had a great time and experience in Moldova – especially at the Central market in Chisinau and hopefully this is not their last time in Moldova.

I will let pictures to speak as usually :

Most beautiful country in the world

Country of contrasts

Johan & Hedvig admiring the history

Most expensive story

Proud house owner

Checking wind/temperature

Mănăstirea Hâncu

Hedvig’s first try to let the surrounding villages (-/+ 20km) that some Swedes came to visit the monastery

An important message from Her Excellence – Princess of Sweden

Amici

Very friendly and hospitable priest

The trip was of course very peaceful, except one small cross-cultural issue

In the end some photos with the local star

Next article will be written from Hong Kong, so be prepared for some spicy words ;).

P.S. some thousands fo photos from this trip are HERE.

Some friends from Czech Republic asked me, if Moldova has something truly spectacular to offer for its tourists. So far many might have gotten the impression that Moldova does not have anything amazing to offer. That is not quite true. There is one thing. A thing that will make your lower jaws hit the floor . One of the most mysterious treasures from Moldova is the largest underground wine cellar in the world, which is “hidden” in our country.

Just 15 km from Chişinău (the capital of Moldova), Cricova mines lay deep underground. The mined limestone has been used for centuries to build the city of Chisinau and surrounding towns.
After the Second World War, someone came with this brilliant idea to use the empty space of this underground world for wine storage. Since the average depth of the caves is 60-80 meters, the temperature is constant and low that makes it just perfect for the storage of wine and the fermentation of sparkling wine – about +12-14°C and humidity of 97-98%. Nowadays, the length of mines is more than 100 km and the winery located there uses about 2/3 of them. It is a labyrinth of subterranean streets, named after wine types, so you can stagger along Cabernet Street before crawling east into Pinot Street and then on Chardonnay, Sauvignon, Feteasca, Aligote, Muscat Streets and so on. You need to have a guide not to get lost. The most fun is to drive a car in this world of large oak barrels filled with aged wine. It is so spacious down there that even a large truck can drive in. Don’t be surprised if you see a traffic light .

A tour in Cricova cellars includes not only a driving and working through these ‘wine tunnels’, but also a delicious dinner served with fine wines.

At the end of the tour you will get a “take-home bag” with a few bottles of collection wines.Cricova’s museum stores the country’s national collection of 1.2 millions of bottles of 653 names of local and world brands. The oldest wineis from 1902 named “Jewish Easter Wine”, another interesting bottle is a Czech Becherovka which is the oldest bottle of liqueur is from the same year .

Not far from Cricova is another wine cellar – Milestii Mici – that has another uniqueness. The Milestii Mici’s wine collection of more than 1,5 million bottles has been included in the Guinness World Records at the category The Largest Quality Wine Collection in the world. The first bottle was stored in 1968, and new vintages are added each year. The total length of underground galleries excavated in lime mining operations is 200 km, 55 km of which are used and explored at the depth of 80-85 m underground.

Moldova is a wine producing nation and I can testify to the fact that the production is good! But wine is more than just a hobby for Moldovans, it is a significant part of the culture, the economy, and even the political life here. Moldovan red wine is considered medicinal and as it is supposed to increase red blood cell counts according to my grandpa . I even heard that some people give their children a little red wine in the summer in order to minimize the UV affects of the sun on them! Every Moldovan home has a cellar and every cellar has a couple of barrels of wine fermenting in it at any given time. It is a tradition that goes back centuries and the homebrew stuff is a deep ruby color and is made from the local red grapes that are grown all over the countryside. When you visit a Moldovan home, you are greeted with a glass of wine and it is a sign of friendship to drink it, though most Moldovans will understand if you do not drink alcohol for religious or personal reasons – we will think you a bit odd – but we will understand .
Another Guinness world record from Moldova is that we have the highest consumption of apples per capita, about 472 apples per year. As you understand, we are a healthy nation by combining apples with quality wine .

References:

When wine is serious…

Milestii Mici

No Sleep for the Weary